Suzanne Iasenza

Mainstream media, movies, and porn have taught us that sex = penis + vagina, and everything else is just secondary. Standard penetration is how men most reliably achieve orgasm. The problem is, women don't orgasm this way. We've separated our most reliable route to orgasm--clitoral stimulation--from how we feel we should orgasm--penetration. As a result, we've created a pleasure gap between women and men. By dispelling the lies, misunderstandings, and myths that have been holding us back, Becoming Cliterate tackles both personal and political problems and replaces them with updated outlooks and practical skills needed to change our collective perspective on sex. (Amazon)

Watter introduces the notion that the penis is a conduit for male emotion, and hence regulates their ability to form and experience intimate relationships. Subsequent chapters explore an existential view of male sexual dysfunction, non-sexual trauma, hypersexuality, changing bodies through illness, age, and injury, and examines badly behaved men to understand the meaning of certain behaviors. (Amazon)

The text offers a 101-style introduction to BDSM before delving into topics ranging from intersectionality within the kink community, to conducting a kink-affirming risk assessment and how to discern between domestic violence and consensual power-exchange. The author explores differential diagnoses and clinical concerns that are relevant to health care providers, including social workers and therapists as well as primary care physicians and sex educators. (Amazon)

The couple challenge, regardless of relationship status or sexual orientation, is to integrate intimacy and eroticism into your relationship, while reinforcing the new sexual mantra of desire/pleasure/eroticism/ satisfaction. Healthy sexuality is a combination of responsibility for your authentic sexual self and being an intimate sexual team. Each chapter in this book presents scientifically-validated guidelines, a compelling case study, and a psychosexual skill exercise to make every concept personal and concrete. Enhancing Couple Sexuality will motivate and empower couples to create and maintain a satisfying, secure, and sexual relationship. Whether you are married or dating, 25 or 65, this valuable resource will provide strategies to enhance your sexual relationship now and in the future. (Amazon)

As a teen or emerging adult, dealing with all the changes going on in your life, body, and mind can be mighty overwhelming. When it comes to sex, everyone seems to have strong feelings and opinions about who you should be and what you should (shouldn't) do. How do you decide who to listen to? Whatever your gender or sexual identity, whether you've already been actively exploring your sexuality or are only just getting curious, S.E.X clearly spells out what you need and want to know—no shame, no judgement, just comprehensive and accurate info in a clear, straightforward language. (Amazon)

In this collection, viewpoints grounded in neural, hormonal, gender, and physiological diversities challenge convention and open up a more inclusive world of somatics for psychotherapy and many forms of bodywork. The authors embody these differences and have developed their particular somatic practices out of direct experience. Their narratives offer new approaches to the transformation of our social order’s bodily roots enabling a healing of the recurrent traumas of the past. Covering topics such as the autistic body-mind, how the human body is both shaped by and shapes contemporary society, and somatic psychotherapy as a trustworthy resource for healing within the African American community, these poignant essays will help students and practitioners of somatics broaden the scope and efficacy of their therapeutic practices. (Amazon)

Attachment theory has entered the mainstream, but most discussions focus on how we can cultivate secure monogamous relationships. What if, like many people, you’re striving for secure, happy attachments with more than one partner? Polyamorous psychotherapist Jessica Fern breaks new ground by extending attachment theory into the realm of consensual nonmonogamy. Using her nested model of attachment and trauma, she expands our understanding of how emotional experiences can influence our relationships.. . . Polysecure is both a trailblazing theoretical treatise and a practical guide. (Amazon)

World-renowned activist and poet Sonya Renee Taylor invites us to reconnect with the radical origins of our minds and bodies and celebrate our collective, enduring strength. As we awaken to our own indoctrinated body shame, we feel inspired to awaken others and to interrupt the systems that perpetuate body shame and oppression against all bodies. When we act from this truth on a global scale, we usher in the transformative opportunity of radical self-love, which is the opportunity for a more just, equitable, and compassionate world—for us all. (Amazon)

This essential book aims to enhance therapists’ supervisory practices and clinical treatments when working with culturally diverse and marginalized populations, fostering greater understanding and awareness. Innovative tools that integrate the impacts of acculturation, minority status, intersectionality, and minority stress are discussed, with case studies, demonstrations, and critical questions included. This collection is a necessary read for anyone who is training or is an established sex therapist, marriage and family therapist, relationship counsellor, or sexuality educator and consultant. (Amazon)

Combining the author’s extensive clinical experience with contemporary evidence-based research, the chapters of this book explore the origins and development of sexual minority groups, going beyond lesbian women and gay men to include transgender and gender nonbinary people, kink and polyamory, bisexuality and pansexuality, and those who identify as asexual or aromantic. The text also offers in-depth coverage of clinical work with transgender, gender-nonconforming, and nonbinary clients of all ages. With a wealth of therapeutic strategies and case studies, this resource helps professionals respond to this ‘Big Tent’ community in an informed and empathetic way. (Amazon)

With an emphasis on clear, factual advice, simple, effective exercises, and a warm, reassuring tone, [this book] helps women discover a new world of fulfillment - for themselves. Voted #1 self-help book across over a dozen national surveys totaling 5,000 psychologists by the National Register of health service providers in psychology. (Amazon)

More and more, those who identify as asexual are “coming out,” joining up, and forging a common identity. The time is right for a better understanding of this sexual orientation, written by an expert in the field who has conducted studies on asexuality and who has provided important contributions to understanding asexuality. (Amazon)

Hailed by The New York Times as a “feminist classic,” and “America’s bestselling book on women’s health,” the comprehensive guide to all aspects of women’s health and sexuality, including menopause, birth control, childbirth, sexual health, sexual orientation, gender identity, mental health and general well-being. (Amazon)

Braun-Harvey and Vigorito's sexual health psychotherapy protocol is an innovative treatment approach for men experiencing sexual lives beyond their control. "Out of control sexual behavior" (OCSB) is defined as a sexual health problem in which consensual sexual urges, thoughts, or behaviors feel out of control. (Amazon)

In this accessible, relatable book, [sex researcher Lori A. Brotto] explores the various reasons for sexual problems, such as stress and incessant multitasking, and tells the stories of many of the women she has treated over the years. She also provides easy, effective exercises that readers can do on their own to increase desire and sexual enjoyment, whether their goal is to overcome a sexual difficulty or simply give their love life a boost. (Amazon)

For more than 20 years, Betty Dodson has been dedicated to taking the shame out of masturbation, showing it to be a healthy form of sexual expression. With warmth and intelligence, and informative line drawings, Dodson explains how anyone can learn to fully enjoy the pleasures of self-love, pointing out that masturbation is still the safest sex. (Amazon)

The third edition of this timeless guide to communication and sex has been revised to include new content addressing nontraditional relationships beyond the polyamorous paradigm of "more than two": couples who don't live together, couples who don't have sex with each other, nonparallel arrangements, couples with widely divergent sex styles, power disparities, and cross-orientation relationships, while utilizing nonbinary gender language and new terms that have come into common usage since the last edition. (Amazon)

Inspired by Our Bodies, Ourselves, the classic and powerful compendium written for and by women, Trans Bodies, Trans Selves is widely accessible to the transgender population, providing authoritative information in an inclusive and respectful way and representing the collective knowledge base of dozens of influential experts. Each chapter takes the reader through an important transgender issue, such as race, religion, employment, medical and surgical transition, mental health topics, relationships, sexuality, parenthood, arts and culture, and many more. (Amazon)

For two decades, this universally acclaimed book on sexuality has been the most trusted and accessible resource for kids, parents, teachers, librarians, and anyone else who cares about the well-being of tweens and teens. Now, in honor of its anniversary, It’s Perfectly Normal has been updated with information on subjects such as safe and savvy Internet use, gender identity, emergency contraception, and more. (Amazon)

(From the author) I originally wrote this book for people who wanted to have better sex. But then it started winning awards and being used in college sex-ed courses. So I tried to make the book all things to all people, and it started to grow, and grow, and grow. 
But with this new edition, I’ve taken the Guide To Getting It On back to its roots …. This edition is about you, assuming you are looking for a book that is down to earth, fun to read, and is your best ally when it comes to having really good sex.

Ian Kerner offers a radical new philosophy for pleasuring women in She Comes First—an essential guidebook to oral sex ...An indispensable aid to a healthier, more fulfilling sex life for her and him. (Amazon)

Noted psychologist Dr. Charles Silverstein has collaborated once again with critically acclaimed novelist Felice Picano on this third edition, updating every single entry and adding nearly thirty new entries. The authors provide positive and responsible advice on safe sex in all its varieties; on emotional and relationship-oriented issues such as long-term couples, loneliness, and growing older; and on scores of diverse topics ranging from spirituality to online dating. With fifty new line drawings by acclaimed illustrator Joseph Phillips, this landmark reference is a necessary addition to every gay man's bookshelf. (Amazon)

Two leading experts on human sexuality explain how to make sex more enjoyable without intercourse, helping men and women alike rediscover the pleasures of sensuality and "outercourse." (Amazon)

A gentle guide, a resource for healing, learning, and thriving, helping survivors to: break through isolation, shame, fear, and grief; achieve understanding of the long-term effects of sexual abuse; and take power over their lives, relationships, work, emotions, and sexuality. It enables the reader to begin working through issues of trust, intimacy, sexual confusion, loss, power, control, and connection -- making life choices that aren’t determined by the abuse.  (Amazon)

This widely esteemed, comprehensive guide helps survivors of sexual abuse heal from the past, improve relationships, and discover the joys of sexual intimacy. Wendy Maltz sensitively takes readers step-by-step through the recovery process, integrating expert advice with groundbreaking exercises, proven techniques, and first-person accounts of women and men at every stage of sexual healing. (Amazon)

Common wisdom has it that love is fragile, but leading psychoanalyst Stephen A. Mitchell argues that romance doesn't actually diminish in long-term relationships—it becomes increasingly dangerous. What we regard as the transience of love is really risk management. Mitchell shows that love can endure, if only we become aware of our self-destructive efforts to protect ourselves from its risks. (Amazon)

The Erotic Mind explains the many paradoxes of erotic life, such as: why we're most excited when we must overcome obstacles; how anxiety, guilt, and anger—generally thought to have a negative impact on sexual arousal—often turn out to be aphrodisiacs; how we use unresolved issues from our early lives to intensify passion; and why the best sex is dynamic and unpredictable, rather than static and safe. These and other insights, combined with concrete suggestions for increasing our enjoyment, overcoming our problems, and revitalizing our relationships, will change forever the way we think about our eroticism. (Amazon)

Researchers have spent the last decade trying to develop a “pink pill” for women to function like Viagra does for men. So where is it? Well, for reasons this book makes crystal clear, that pill will never be the answer—but as a result of the research that’s gone into it, scientists in the last few years have learned more about how women’s sexuality works than we ever thought possible, and Come as You Are explains it all. (Amazon)

Couples may assume that they are monogamous, but never discuss exactly what the monogamy agreement means to them. What happens when this implicit agreement is broken? After infidelity, relationships can become strained as both partners lose trust and faith in each other. The New Monogamy offers a way out of these difficulties for couples struggling to stay together after infidelity. Couples make these implicit assumptions and agreements explicit so that each partner knows exactly what is expected of them in the future and what they can expect from their partner. (Amazon)

First published in 1999, [this book has] been lauded for its thoroughness, enthusiastic tone, and creative, nonjudgmental approach to lesbian sex in all its rich variety. (Library Journal lamented, "Why can't more heterosexual sex manuals be this good?") … Sex educator Felice Newman has completely updated this classic guide. There is new information throughout, up-to-date research, fresh quotes from women who share their real-world experiences, a greatly expanded resource guide, new illustrations, and an entire new chapter on sex and partnership.

Drawing on more than twenty years of experience as a couples therapist, Perel examines the complexities of sustaining desire. Through case studies and lively discussion, Perel demonstrates how more exciting, playful, and even poetic sex is possible in long-term relationships. Wise, witty, and as revelatory as it is straightforward, Mating in Captivity is a sensational book that will transform the way you live and love. (Amazon)

Acclaimed psychologist David Schnarch guides couples toward greater intimacy with proven techniques developed in his clinical practice and worldwide workshops. Chapters―covering everything from understanding love relationships to helpful "tools for connections" to keeping the sparks alive years down the road―provide the scaffolding for overcoming sexual and emotional problems. (Amazon)

Sexual Outsiders [by David M. Ortmann and Richard A. Sprott] is designed as a guide for BDSM community members who must wade through the quagmire of unique problems they face: coming out to family, friends and partners; distinguishing abusive relationships from healthy consensual ones; finding and developing community; overcoming shame and denial; exploring whether BDSM sexuality can be a healing tool; gaining access to quality, culturally competent psychotherapy; and finding strategies to develop a healthy sexual self-esteem in the face of current medical and social standards that view them as sick or pathological. The book also serves as an educational primer for those whose partners, friends, and family members are involved in BDSM. (Amazon)

Drawing on in-depth interviews with over a hundred women and men, Opening Up explores the real-life benefits and challenges of all styles of open relationships — from partnered non-monogamy to solo polyamory. With her refreshingly down-to-earth style and sharp wit, Taormino offers solutions for making an open relationship work, including tips on dealing with jealousy, negotiating boundaries, finding community, parenting and time management. (Amazon)

Fieldwork, intensive interviews, and surveys provided a wealth of data about the nature of bisexual attraction, the steps that lead people to become bisexual, and how sexual preference can change over time. (Amazon)

Bernie Zilbergeld reports findings from his twenty years as a psychologist specializing in human sexuality, as well as those other experts in the field, and shares his own and his clients' experiences.  the result is the most comprehensive guide ever to enhancing desire and arousal, focusing on pleasure rather than performance, and keeping sex exciting and fulfilling.

Using rich case material and research presented by distinguished authorities in the fields of sex, couple, family, and psychotherapy, this edited book contributes to our efforts to help individuals and couples increase their sexual satisfaction. The authors explore social and cultural backgrounds, the meaning of sexual problems in specific cultural contexts, and the way in which culture presents challenges to traditional psychotherapy. More importantly, they answer the question: should therapists accept any and all behaviors, values, and attitudes that are considered normal, even if they violate the therapist’s own cultural standards? The case studies identify challenging cultural issues and provide clinicians with culturally sensitive treatment options. (Amazon)

Magnificent Sex is based on the largest, in-depth interview study ever conducted with people who are having extraordinary sex. It gathers the nuggets for remarkable sex from the "experts", distilling them into an attainable blueprint for ordinary lovers who want to make erotic intimacy grow over the course of a lifetime. Looking at factors including individual and relational qualities, empathic communication and the myths and realities of magnificent sex, this book offers accessible and evidence-based guidance for lovers and therapists alike. (Amazon)

In Naked at Our Age, [Joan Price] offers a candid, straight-talking exploration of senior sexuality--the challenges, the disappointments, and the surprises, as well as the delights of love and passion. She shares the stories of women and men--coupled and single, straight and gay--demonstrating how their sex lives and relationships have changed with age, and how their sex lives influence their lives and self-esteem. Along the way, she offers wise advice from sex therapists, health professionals, counselors, sex educators, and other knowledgeable experts, helping seniors to embrace intimacy in all its forms. (Amazon)

Through the use of artful drawings and descriptive text, this manual engages mental health and medical professionals and their clients by appealing to both the visual and the analytical. It discusses how modifications to Sensate Focus can be applied to diverse populations, such as LGBTQ clients, the elderly, the disabled, trauma survivors, and those with challenges such as Autism Spectrum, anxiety, and depression. The book also offers suggestions for dealing with common client difficulties such as avoidance, confusion, and goal directed attitudes. This comprehensive approach to Sensate Focus will remind readers of the beauty and power of touch while offering suggestions for moving from avoidance to sensory transcendence. (Amazon)